‘My Big Fat Fabulous Life’ star Whitney Way Thore additionally shared why she doesn’t want to have kids on her own.
Whitney Way Thore is getting candid about her split. In an interview with ET’s Deidre Behar, the star of My Big Fat Fabulous Life admitted that she’s still in love with her ex-boyfriend, who viewers only know as the Frenchman.
“I’m still in love with him. We actually broke up in April a year ago,” she said of the mystery man. “… He’s the best. He’s the best man I’ve ever known.”
As for why they couldn’t make it work, Thore explained, “Unfortunately, this is one of these things that comes with reality TV, which is, I’d say, one of the negatives. He does not want a public life at all.”
“That’s the biggest [reason we split] for sure… He’s not interested [in reality TV],” she said. “What happened after the speculation and the this and the that [is] he saw how crazy people on the internet were [and] that was it. He was done.”
Now, Thore is putting herself back into the dating world, though she’s not exactly jumping in with both feet.
“I haven’t been out and about much… I haven’t been approached by a single man in any way. The dating sites are pretty abysmal in Greensboro… There’s just not a lot to to pick through,” she said of her North Carolina hometown. “Especially when you have this other person, this other relationship that you love so much, it’s really hard to get excited about dating. But I do not want to be alone forever, [so I’m] trying to put in the work to meet a man.”
At the end of the day, Thore said she’s “trying to move on” from the Frenchman.
“If somebody amazing showed up on my doorstep I would be all for it, but you know how it is when you love somebody. It sets a high standard,” she said. “I joke about being desperate, but the truth is I wish I were. If I were truly desperate, I could have somebody. But I’m not. I know what I want. I know what I deserve. I don’t even think that my standards are too high or anything. I think they’re just kind of the bare minimum. I’m still dealing with that, but I’m also certainly open to dating.”
Thore’s relationship status is one reason she feels that she’s “in the throes of a midlife crisis” since her 40th birthday in April.
“I turned 40 and I cared a lot. It hit me like a ton of bricks, actually,” she said. “… Part of it is not even necessarily how I feel about being 40. I think that, regardless of how I feel about it, society has certain expectations of a 40-year-old woman and what her life is like. I feel like it’s not that different than being fat. I can be confident in myself all day long, but people will still perceive me with their own judgments.”
Another cause of her discontent is that she’s “examining my fertility.”
“[I’m asking myself if I] am gonna get to have kids and mourning the fact that that really may not happen,” she said. “… That’s a real thing that I have to kind of come to terms with. I’ve been struggling for sure. I’m not ready to get another cat at this point.”
While many women have decided to pursue motherhood on their own, Thore told ET that she doesn’t feel it’s an option for her.
“If I don’t have a partner, then I don’t want a child. People say you can adopt, you can do it yourself. Absolutely you can. I think that’s wonderful for women who want to take that on. It’s not something that I want,” she said. “I know, no matter how much you plan, you could always end up being a single mom… but I’m [not] gonna do it intentionally. It’s not something that I feel confident enough in.”
“I’ve thought a lot about it and I could imagine my life without children if I had a partner, but I cannot imagine the rest of my life without a partner,” Thore added. “I’m still dealing with that… It’s just not something that I’m used to the thought of it. It’s just something I’ve always assumed would happen, and so coming to terms with it not happening feels like a loss… It feels like something that I’m grieving, honestly.”
Looking ahead to the next few years, Thore said her priorities are threefold: a relationship, her family and a zest for life.
“I want a partner. That is true. I’m not ashamed, embarrassed, to say it at all. I think I could come to terms with not having children. It would be very difficult for me to come to terms with another five or 10 years without a partner,” she said. “That does not sound fun to me. It’s difficult now with dating, because you find a lot of men are not looking for a 40-year-old woman.”
As for her family, Thore, whose mom, Barbara “Babs” Thore, died in December 2022, said, “My dad’s almost 80 years old, my brother is in a relationship… I’ve always been extremely close with my parents. Once you’ve lost a parent, it all just becomes a little bit more real about [potentially] losing another one. I wanna make sure that I’m living the best life I can with my dad, having experiences with him, just not taking anything for granted, and enjoying the rest of my family.”
When it comes to the third point, Thore noted, “I started this season really just trying to get back in touch with things that give me joy like taking dance classes.”
“I know we’re four years out from the pandemic, but I still feel like I’m in that shelter in place, isolation mode. I never came out of it, really, and it’s not been great,” she said. “I just want to continue to get back to my roots, get back out into the world, and just try to find joy and the little moments in life.”
