Sister Wives’ Robyn Brown is still struggling with the end of the life she once had.

“There is a weird feeling of, ‘This was the agreement — to be together and end up together and always be a family.’ And I just feel like people left,” Kody Brown’s one remaining sister wife tells PEOPLE of dealing with the fallout of her husband’s failed relationships.

Christine Brown was first to leave the plural marriage in November 2021. Thirteen months later, Janelle Brown announced her separation from Kody, followed by Meri Brown’s confirmation that Kody no longer considered himself married to her.

Robyn admits that “Meri’s situation [is] different than maybe Janelle or Christine’s. She hung on for a really long time. So it’s a very different way that I look at that than I do maybe Janelle or Christine. But, yeah, I feel kind of abandoned.”

She concludes, “It’s not completely logical, but it’s emotional. And so that’s kind of how I feel. Yeah, it’s hard.”

The emotion Robyn has experienced the most is grief. “Right now, it’s a constant fight not to think about it and to not be sad,” she admits. “I am definitely going through a lot of loss and grieving with this situation. I really hope — I mean, that would be the goal is to just accept the situation and figure out how to be happy despite, and honor people’s journey. And that’s my goal right now.”

Kody previously acknowledged to PEOPLE that his dynamic with Robyn changed after the other women left their plural marriage agreement.

“We are not recovering from this,” he said. “I mean, it’s not clinical depression, but we’ve been a bit depressed about what the experience did. That’s an understatement. But we’ve been through a very hard experience and our reaction to it has changed us. We are not the same.